So let me see if I can do this, what a difference a few hours can make. The doctor that diagnosed Cooper's condition when I was 4 moths pregnant, Dr. R (I have no idea how to spell his name), well he was in today to do a follow up ECHO. He is the Chief Cardiologist and has not been wrong about one little thing yet. Well he himself came in to do the ECHO and determined there is a small hole in the patch that Dr. O'Brien did. He said it appears some of the stitching came undone. He also determined the the Pulmonary Arteries are extremely small. He said that he will consult with Dr. O'Brien but believed they would have to observe Cooper over the next SEVERAL days and wait to see what happens but additional surgery is possible. He said they would definitely need to go back in through a cardiac catheter and balloon the pulmonary arteries. I don't know if Cooper can handle another surgery! I don't know if I can handle another surgery. I just want to take him home!
Right before all of this Sherri, Karli, the girls and Raelynn came over. We went out to the park to have a picnic and play. It was wonderful. Raelynn hugs me so tight. But today when she left she didn't just give me love and leave with a smile on her face. I put her on the elevator and she came running off crying asking me to not leave her. Can this get any harder. I had done such a good job of not crying in front of her but I couldn't do it any more. I ended up carrying her all the way to the van and buckling her sweet little self in her car seat and sticking a kiss she had given me in my pocket for Cooper. I carried that kiss all the way back up here to Cooper and gave it to him and then just stood and cried thinking how much easier this would all be if I just didn't love them so much.
So everyone has been in to see what they can do for me and it is impossible to tell nice people to just leave me alone but that is all I want them to do. Instead I smile and say I am fine. I will be fine and who cares about me, just make Cooper better and make sure Raelynn knows how much I love her and that nothing else in this world would keep me away from her like this.
Burden Bearer's
9 years ago
2 comments:
Jesus told his apostles to "Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest." (Mark 6 31b) Even Jesus needed quiet time as do you. Take 1 minute (or more) to clear your mind and let God take control. He will meet your needs and take care of you.
BJK
Ok, first off Dr. O'Brien discussed the fact about the small arteries, I believe he said they would improve with time. Don't let yourself get down. You have faith in Dr. O'Brien. You can't think they would put Cooper through anything that he could not handle. I know you do not want to talk right now but please call if you want us down there. You know there are hundreds of people praying for Cooper and will do whatever you want us to do. Keep positive and by all means take care of yourself. Raelynn will be just fine wherever she is and of course she wants to be home as you and everyone wants that but we must do whatever it takes to get Cooper well. Stay strong. You know the Lord is with you through all of this. We Love you guys.
Mom
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