COOPER IS GROWING UP TOO......

First I am so excited to say that I have made my first Blog Book and got it this week. It is awesome. I used this program to convert all blogs from when I started in October of 2007 through the end of 2008. I did this first to see how it turned out and then was planning to convert 2009 and then would do each year as we go along. I ordered 2 books so Cooper and Raelynn would each have one. I realize right now it is not that big of a deal to them but can you imagine when they are my age to read back over everything that went on and how your mother felt about it. I think it would be awesome. I had told Realynn about it and on Tuesday when I picked her up from school I let her know it had came in and I would show her after work. When we got home it was the first thing she asked. So she and Cooper sat down beside me on the floor and I showed them this book. I made the comment to Raelynn that I knew right now it wasn't that big of a deal but when she got older she would love it. She stops looking at the book, leans over to me, gives me a strong hug and sweet kiss and says, "Mommy, I already love it!" Oh if she only knew how much that meant to me.

So as I had said we moved Coop into a toddler bed and everything was going great, that was until last Sunday or Monday. For 2 nights in a row Coop was out of bed and into our room 6 or 7 times a night. He would walk in to our room, sometimes to Terry's side, sometimes to mine. We would get up, get him a drink, and put him back into his own bed. Of course with him getting up all the time I was sleeping lighter than usual. One time I heard his little patter of foot steps down the hall but they seemed to stop short of our room. I sprung out of bed not knowing why he had stopped before he got to us. As I entered the hall I peaked into Raelynn's room and there Coop was along side her bed. He was brushing her bangs off her forehead so softly and whispering, "Good morning Sissy!" I would have given anything to just stand there and watch Raelynn's reaction when he finally woke her but I knew that was just mean to Raelynn. I went in and got Coop and let him know it was not morning yet and he had to go back to bed. On the third night, Terry was putting Coop to bed and I told Cooper, "you can't get out of bed during the night when Mommy and Daddy are sleeping, if you need something you holler for Mommy and I will come to you." He responded with his standard sweet, "Otay!" Do you know he has not been out of bed since?! He did get up last night but Terry was still up and he just came out to see what he was doing.

Our fun this week has been making dinner. Raelynn usually helps me but this week she and Coop have basically done the cooking....with a little supervision. It might take longer but is sure more fun cooking with little helpers. They managed to make Smothered Chicken and egg, bacon and cheese biscuits and have eaten much better as well, at least Raelynn has :)

Tomorrow we make our first presentation of funds for the foundation to 2 families. I am so excited to meet them and to give them some support. This is all so great I cannot believe it is really happening!!!

THE WAY A WEEKEND SHOULD BE.....

Earlier this week Raelynn brought home a poem that I love. It is what we all need to do from time to time.....

Just for this morning, I am
going to step over the laundry,
and pick you up and take you to the park to play.

Just for this morning, I will
leave the dishes in the sink,
and let you teach me how to put that puzzle
of yours together.

Just for this afternoon, I will
unplug the telephone and
keep the computer off, and sit with you in the
backyard and blow bubbles.

Just for this afternoon, I will
not yell once, not even a
tiny grumble when
you scream and whine for the ice
cream truck, and I will buy you one if
he comes by.

Just for this afternoon, I won't
worry about what you are
going to be when you grow up, or second guess
every decision I have made
where you are concerned.

Just for this afternoon, I will let
you help me bake cookies, and I won't
stand over you trying to fix them.

Just for this afternoon, I will take
us to McDonald's and buy us both a
Happy Meal so you can have both toys.

Just for this evening, I will hold
you in my arms and tell you a story
about how you were born and how
much I love you.

There was no author listed but I love this poem. There is no way we can always walk over the laundry or let dishes sit but there is no doubt that it can happen once in awhile for at least a little while. Today when Raelynn asked if she could watch a movie, I said let's play a game instead. It was great! Later in the afternoon while Coop slept and all I had on my mind was to get a stack of things done, Raelynn asks if we can make a smoothie. I started to stay, "not right now", but instead thought of this poem and we made a smoothie. I remember playing the game and making the smoothie as the best parts of the day and not all the stuff I managed to get done.

Last night was the Cooper's Cause Poke Tournament. We expected a lot more players than showed up but we still raised over $600 which is great! I think everyone had a good time. Raelynn and Coop ran around until about 9pm and then we headed home but the tournament didn't get over until 12:30am. Anyway, it was really pretty fun to see how it all works and we raised money to help another family next year, what else could you want for a Saturday night :)!



Raelynn read Coop his bedtime story tonight. It was so sweet! Coop picked the book but Raelynn knew the whole thing front to back. They are just so sweet together. However, Coop has decided that Sissy's hair is for pulling and Raelynn is not a big fan of that. She told him today that if he keeps pulling her hair she would start pulling his ears! I guess that was the first thing that came to her mind since they just stick out there. Awe.....the love of a brother and sister!


Although Terry loves Raelynn and Cooper so much, he still keeps room in his heart for his first born........

COOPER, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH YOU.........

The morning started out so great. Coop decided he would help me wake Raelynn up. He goes into her room and with his tiny fingers he brushes her bangs to the side and whispers, "Good morning Tissy (Sissy)!" A smile instantly beamed on Raelynn's face as she stretched and slowly opened her eyes, "Good morning Buddy!" I can not think of a better way to start the morning.

Then the morning took a turn, we had Coop's third synagis shot this morning. The shot is based on weight so Coop always gets weighed, then examined by Dr. Kelley and then the shots. We strip him down and out to the scales we go and that is when we find out the Cooper has lost 3 oz over the last month. That might not sound like much, but any loss with Coop is a big deal. Dr. Kelley measured his liver and examined him and his heart and we talked. We feel like his weight loss is just due to his increase in activity and therefore there is little we can do. We already fortify his milk to the maximum amount his body will stand for so there is really little we can do. Terry and I knew he was increasing his activity because he was actually starting to take breaks during play. Because of his reduced oxygen supply, when he plays hard or is running around or going up and down stairs he is easily "winded". There have been a couple times that he has just laid down for a minute or two after he has been running around and we notice his hands and lips appear a little dusky. Anyway, the weight loss was very discouraging and if he continues to loose we will have to go back to a slow feeding drip during the night. This means we would go back to a feeding tube and let it run slowly over the night while he sleeps. Can you imagine holding him down every night and inserting a feeding tube up his little nose and down to his stomach while he yells, "No Mommy" or "it hurts Mommy"? No this is not something I want to imagine let alone actually have to do. Dr. Kelley was trying to be encouraging and said we will list his feeding as stable this month and reevaluate his weight next month and go from there. I know this should not be that big of a deal but for some reason it seemed horrible to me. It does not help that Coop cries so hard when he gets his 2 huge synagis shots and repeatedly tells me how his "shots hurt" and how he holds on so tight to my neck afterwards that I actually feel the shots myself and then I have to take him to daycare, tell him he will be fine and leave while all I want to do is continue holding him. Anyway, I know this is minor but I like the appointments where he gains weight much much better!

SISSY LOVES HER BOO.....................

What a week we had last week. Raelynn is in an unbelievably good phase. She has been so grown up and so good, but it wasn't her wonderful behavior and attitude that really made last week touching. Last Sunday we were with some of Terry's family discussing Coop's next cardiac appointment on Feb. 3rd when they will determine when his next surgery will be. Then on Monday or Tuesday while Terry and I were cleaning up the kitchen after dinner we were talking about the families that Cooper's Cause was providing funds to. One of the families' baby did not make it and Raelynn was asking questions about them. We were talking openly about the situation and Raelynn knows that the foundation is to help other families with kids like Coop so she had asked me a few questions about the babies heart defects. The following day, I picked Raelynn up from school and dropped her off at Mary Beth's. She gets to Mary Beth's a little before 2pm and the little kids take their naps at 2pm. Well I guess after I left and they went to put Coop down for his nap, Raelynn began sobbing that she had not got any time to play with her brother. Mary Beth said she was just sobbing. I didn't put this all together until Thursday. I picked Raelynn up from school and headed to Mary Beth's. We are just talking away when Raelynn asks me when Coop's next surgery is. I told her we would find out in a couple weeks on Feb. 3rd. She asks if he would be in the hospital again and I let her know he would. She then asked what they were doing to his heart this time. I told her they were still trying to fix it just like last time. She replies to me, "Is he going to die again?" It was like a light bulb coming on to me. All the talk about his next surgery and of the other family loosing their baby left Raelynn with the fear of losing her little brother. She understands that we almost lost him last time and now I had just told her they were doing the same surgery they had before. I replied to her that I didn't know if Boo would die or not but we were lucky to have so much of him in our hearts that we would never be without him. I told her we had to trust that God has a plan for Cooper and whatever that plan is we have to believe it is the perfect plan. She says, "I would miss him." By this time I can hardly keep the tears back but I manage to say, "I would miss him too." This was the end of our conversation and she went on to say she was hungry and wondered what was for lunch. I couldn't help but realize our resilient little girl is still just 4 years old and I know that I do not want her worrying about anything but the things a 4 year old should, but unfortunately we are beyond that and now we just have to make sure that she doesn't keep her grown up worries to herself and that we can continue to talk about them. I also think that not only talking to her and with her but letting her be as much a part of Cooper's daily activities and she wants to be will help. So I will continue watching her help with his bathes, brush his teeth, get ready for dinner every night, read him stories, play game after game with him, teach him new words and on and on, and the whole while I will remember inside that she is not doing this just because she loves her brother but because she fears losing even a second with him, much as I do.

UNBELIEVABLE KIDS.......

I think I have said this before, but I have to say it again. I don't want to make it sound like we have no difficult times or rough days with the kids. Raelynn sometimes makes getting dressed in the mornings the most frustrating thing I do all day. She won't wear jeans, shirts can't be too tight around her arms, she can never wear two long sleeves together including her coat....the list goes on and on. Coop will throw toys and markers and when I tell him no, he turns around and does the same thing again. Sometimes he just wines until I pick him up when I am trying to make dinner, put away clothes, bath Raelynn, etc. So no, things are not always perfect, but even during these times I think I have the best kids in the world. Not only do I cherish these times but I think each challenge helps me learn to parent them better. Even when I am most frustrated, there is no place I would rather be. I guess it is because of this I feel like most of our days are so amazingly special that I wish I could freeze them in time. The past couple days have been some of those very special days. On Sunday Raelynn and I headed to church. Typically Raelynn goes to Sunday School and I go to church. When we were walking into the church Raelynn looks up at me and says, "Mom can I go to church with you today, I feel like spending some time with you?" Well who could say no to that. So I remind her that she has to sit quietly the whole time or I would take her to her Sunday School class. She did sit quietly and cuddled up to me most of the service. She even laughed at Pastor Bill's jokes and said he was funny. What a little adult. Equally as sweet has been Cooper the last few evenings. We moved him to a toddler bed which led us to a slight change in routine. Before we would hold him for about 3 to 5 minutes before kissing his sweet face and laying him in the crib. Now that he is in a bed I can lay him down and still be knelt beside him so instead of standing and cuddling I just laid him down and knelt beside the bed. He said, "Mommy" and patted the mattress beside him. With a smile I laid my head down beside him. He proceeded to put his arm around my neck and then started rubbing my back. It was so sweet I couldn't move. He then put his two tiny hands under his face and lay face to face with me. He looked at me and just gave me the most pure and simple smile. My heart melted. Now I remember what lead to me lying with Raelynn every night for a few minutes and just talking about the day. There is something about their calm sweet demeanor as they lay right before falling asleep. This is another time that is indescribable if you have never been a parent. Thank goodness someone decided I needed to be a parent even when I wasn't necessarily thinking so.

Tonight Raelynn started tumbling. She was so excited she was up 45 minutes early this morning! It was so fun to watch her not only tumbling but also her interaction with her friends. I love to see how their little relationships develop. Cooper took another step in eating. Tonight Raelynn requested a banana for bedtime snack. Of course her bedtime snacks are always custom ordered and tonight she wanted the banana sliced and then halved and served with a toothpick. I guess Coop thought this looked good too and when he asked Sissy if he could have a bite, as always, she gave him one. He ate it and even asked for another. He ate 2 to 4 bites. It may not seem like much but for Coop this is HUGE!

I know the world will not always seem so perfect with them, but I am sure enjoying it right now!

A BIG NIGHT FOR COOPER......

Wow was tonight some big steps for Cooper. As you know, Coop still does not eat anything but chips and candy. Of course there are a few other things like crackers and an apple slice once in a great while but tonight at dinner I gave him a few of the things we were having as I always do. Raelynn was playing the waitress which she often does. When she delivered Coop's bowl which contained a few peas and carrots and some pasta, she set it down and took his little spoon and said,"here Coop Sissy made this for you" and gave him a pea. HE ATE IT! And then he proceeded to eat more. He ate all the peas and carrots I gave him. Of course he did not want more but it is still a huge deal that he ate what I gave him. We were all celebrating! Then tonight we changed Coop's crib from a crib to a toddler bed, or "big boy bed" as Raelynn and he are calling it. He has been down for about 20 minutes and so far not a peep from him. Could it be that Coop would handle transitions as easily at Raelynn did? Could we be so lucky? I guess only time will tell. I still remember the first night Raelynn slept in her "big girl bed". We heard about 3 thuds followed by crying. It was really kind of funny! She never minded sleeping in her big bed though and eventually she did quit falling out!

We had a pretty good week. Raelynn and Cooper got their Christmas presents from Aunt Barbara which consisted of some cute clothes, pj's and an electric keyboard. The keyboard was a huge hit. It caused a little discontent however. Both kids wanted it ALL the time. They are learning to take turns and be patient but it has had to be put up a couple times. Aunt Steph and Cody came in for a surprise visit on Wednesday night. Cody came up to help some friends with snow removal. The kids loved seeing them. Steph watched the kids on Thursday so they got some good quality time together.

One of the most exciting parts of the week came when two families were selected by the foundation to receive benefits. I got to place a call to the families to let them know and I cannot even explain how great it felt to make that call. This is what we have been working so hard towards. It makes every late night and all the hours of work so worth it! A good friend of mine said in an email to me earlier this week; "God is amazing as he knows where each of us should be right now and has surrounded us with awesome friends and family!!!". Isn't it something, God has given us some great challenges but he also has given us everything and everyone we need to get through them and not just get through them but shine as we do. I have learned so much and grown so much. We are blessed beyond belief.

The other night Terry and I were cleaning up the kitchen and discussing the days events when we realized the kids were being much too quiet. We walked into the living room and there they sat together on the couch completely involved in what was on TV. The problem......they were watching Desperate Housewives!

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HAPPY NEW YEAR........

The last week of 2009 was a fun one. Our daycare was closed the week between Christmas and New Years so the kids were shuffled from place to place but had a great time. I took Monday off work and spent the day with them. There was still so much snow on the ground and it was cold so we spent the morning playing with all the new Christmas presents. Raelynn decided that Coop's shoe drawer needed rearranging so she stayed busy with that (kid after my own heart) Coop decided to help her and started throwing his shoes at her. I told him no twice but he continued (no surprise there). Anyway, after throwing the shoes a third time I told Coop, "that's it, you need to sit in time out!" We designated the 2nd stair down on our stairway long ago as the time out chair, but Cooper has never been put in time out and it has been quite some time since Raelynn has been. To my surprise when I told Coop he needed to sit in timeout he replies, "O Tay" and marches himself right to the second stair and sits. Now how he knew where time out was is beyond me but it also became very apparent that he has done time out before. That leads me to believe that when Mary Beth tells me everyday how good the kids were, she may be fibbing just a little :) Anyway, Coop sat there in time out for quite awhile with not a sound. Then he says, "Mommy! I sorry, I get up now?" I thought I was going to crack up. I asked him if he was going to throw his shoes at Sissy anymore and he quickly responded "No!". I never thought putting your child in timeout could be so darn cute! Later that afternoon we headed to Walmart to return some light up shoes we had gotten for Raelynn that were too small. (Her feet are going to be bigger than mine by Kindergarten!) We went back to shoes and found an entirely different pair that she liked better. We headed to customer service for the exchange. Raelynn was holding both pairs of shoes. We were waiting in line and Cooper was trying to get out of the cart and wanted his coat off and so on. I was dealing with him when I realize it is our turn and that Raelynn had already walked up to the counter. She puts both shoes on the counter and says to the clerk, "I want these shoes instead of these, they are too small. Do you need my receipt?" The clerk looks up at me with a huge smile, I smile back. She tells Raelynn she would take the receipt if she has it. Raelynn looks at me and says, "Mom we need the receipt please." I hand her the receipt and she carries on with her business. The clerk puts the exchange receipt down and says she needs me to sign it and Raelynn says, "It's ok, I can sign my own name." The clerk and I both start laughing. I have decided that once a girl knows how to exchange items and use a credit card, she is ready for the real world! It was all way too funny!

After our fun day on Monday, it was Dad's turn on Tuesday. They had a fun day together as well. They put together Coop's new Handy Manny work bench which I think was equally fun for all three of them. Then they spent some time out in the freezing cold playing in the snow. Terry said they didn't last long but at least they got to play a little.




Tuesday night we headed to the KU game. I love going to games. It is so much fun. Raelynn loves the pregame and stays interested for awhile but her attention span is not too long. Cooper on the other hand could have watched for ever. He just stood there and clapped and watched not only the game but people in general. He is just so laid back.

Wednesday the kids headed over to Jan Pollard's. When we were trying to get this week covered I had asked Raelynn who she wanted to stay with and Jan was the first name she gave me. Fortunately Jan was willing to do it. They had a great day. They got to play with Jan's granddaughter Emma who is almost 3 and made Snicker doodle Cookies. They were all smiles when I picked them up and both had a great time. Thanks Jan!

Thursday Terry's niece Emily came to the house to stay with them. I think they had a good time too. They got to play with their cousin Jaxson and other than a few mishaps :) things seemed to go well. Raelynn had been looking forward to New Year's Eve all week. I had told her that she could stay up with us to celebrate this year. We made snacks and even let Raelynn have a soda (Diet Sprite). We played games and watched shows. At 11:40 Raelynn says she is going to lay down because she is so tired. No way was I going to let her when we were so close. So we started trying to keep her awake and made a special drink in champagne glasses (OJ and Diet Sprite). We had told her all about the "ball dropping" and when the count down started she was so excited. When it hit midnight we were hugging and cheering and having our toast, she missed the ball drop. She was a little disappointed but still loved it. I would have never imagined a night at home with a 4 year old would be a wonderful way to celebrate the New Year but it was great!

We spent New Year's Day and the rest of the weekend trying to get the house back to normal and caught up on paperwork. I think we are finally almost there! I am excited to see what the New Year holds for us and cannot wait to see how the kids learn and grow. I know the year will go by much too fast and that is why my New Year's resolution is to cherish every minute of every day because it will be a minute I will never get back.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!